Monday, August 15, 2016

Απλώς επιθυμίες ή ένα γραπτό μύνημα

Yesterday,I thought of calling you. I felt like needing you,I felt like needing to hear your voice. But then again no. I rejected this thought,I knew and I know that I should let go. You know,you being seen as an angel and a miracle to me,made me being attached to you,so badly. I would always be the one feeling guilty about doing shit to you and then regret for years. Years,yes. Yesterday, I sadly realized,you're not the saint I had the image of. I blindly gave my all to you,even though I moved on,I was always yours and you knew. You knew and you had a complete control of me. Well,that's not what I fought for. The love I was fighting for is not a typical teenager relationship. So,I guess you were right when you described our thing as a teenager love,while I was the one to surrender it all to you,it doesn't happen often,it won't happen the same way again. It feels weird,being in touch with the past and feeling it all so alive. I miss it,but not you. Not the new you. I miss us. Not you. That describes my behavior well,the so come and go me. Maybe I've hurt you a couple of times,but it wasn't my intention,it never was. So here comes the sun little darling. Here comes you trying to hurt me,intentionally.Maybe my actions have made you more selfish and revengeful to me. But no,you know this shit won't touch me and I so pitty the time I've wasted trying to make you see what was really happening,how strong and magically newfound were all these to me.There's no hate,I don't hate you and I never will. I was the one to choose whether to give my soul to you or not and I did. That part is yours. Those years were completely yours. But it won't touch now,cause i'm building new walls,the new me wouldn't fall for the new you. No more drama needed,but hey;You weren't there.