Monday, September 19, 2016

That place

Do you know where I actually want to be ? I want to be there. There where I won't be dependent by any-one. Usually I depend on people,by wanting it or not. I depend on them because I feel for them. I admire them,or even love them sometimes. In-de-pe-ndent. That's where I'd love to be,not just go there,I would stuck there forever. I'm not angry nor disappointed,I'm sick of the fact that something is missing. Freedom. In bold and italian. Intense and loose. A little careless without being heartless,a little more wilder but not villain. I want to dismiss and ignore tagging and categorizing. But lord,I do. I sin,I do blasphemies,just like the regulars. But there's the biggest sin of mine ; I think out loud,but oh! That's the biggest crime. How can anyone be respectful and moral in their soul,truly and kindly but having that ONE curse? That damn curse of being wider mentally. An open mind, that excludes drugs,heavy partying and having a numerous of people to sleep with anytime. Slash that box! It's not it.
Have you ever wondered why does your neighbor gossip and acting so bad all the time? Have you ever thought of pausing that thought of yours to simple judge? So if you feel bothered by her,why don't you ASK yourself first why would she act so mean? Recently I did, after all the years of my living and guess what? I got an answer. People get tough when they are not interacting with love,people get meaner when things don't go their way,just because they're selfish. So my conclusion,she is sad and miserable. She's imprisoned in her own mind. She's missing love.
You know,I'd like to go in jail sometime,I'd compare what people physically feel in prison and ask myself what's better.. To be imprisoned by a government's jail or having your spirit and soul chained? I wish there would be no jails,no grey and no pain. But there are. I wish they could invent a rehab for the chained souls,the pained ones. I wish they could understand and fight it,fight the demons off them.
I don't want to be touched by negativeness,but i'd help those,who are damned by narrow-mindedness. As you see,there are minds that won't seem to split. Then again,they are and they continuously will try to flow their poisoning feelings to me. My future guardian angels and the security,won't let that get into me. They will actually hug and love them cause they're missing so much stuff. Here comes the day that I actually pitty the poisoners. The selfish,the judges and the drama-queens. I can name them in a trillion ways,but I don't want to be influenced by them. I don't want to hate or even dislike them.
I'd love to be free. Admire my blessings and gifts.
But that tiny little poison has flew into me.
Time to recover.